U Didn't Ask

my production was the result of adolescent lust

for i was raised in the shadows... they spoke to me

after they would grope me

stole hope from me

i found my self raised by an idiot box

living life i wish was mine

mama hard to find

her husband whopping her behind

 gun pressed to her head

knife in his chest while sleepin

mama gone

secret keeping

i have homicidal nightmares

i still see him

life is a game of solitare

my deck had to many jokers

had no chip

so it flip to strip poker

i came up back to the wall

bloody knuckles for the brawl

couldn't escape it

had to take it all

addicted to them thin lines on sheet paper

it was like the reflection from the mirror

my pen was the straight razor

shot

stabbed

unbreakable this life i have

died twice

made moses laugh

and got the devil's autograph 

i prefer real enimies

over fake friends

i swim in the deep end

fighting those demonds that creep in

looking for angel's i can marry today

spread wings of love to me

til im carried away

sorry i get carried away

did u kno that i cry when i write?

and that my spirit is the ambition of moorish blood in derision

my ancestry only blessed me to test me

warriors are not life liver's

they are surviors

my mind is not based on education

but inspiration

and dedication

to never for get 

the strange fruit that littered the southern highways in the south

nat turner

the zulu nation

miss evers boys

the tuskegee airmen

my great great grandfather

he use to play trumpet for Josephine baker 

i got the the blues in me

shackled runaway 

keeping my eye on the finger

yet never missing the heavenly glory

see the fingers on the trigger

who gunna be the next nigger

get popped 

by a cop

case dropped

im sorry ...u didn't ask did u?

her last words were i loved u

then she died in my arms

so when i tell u my heart in the dirt

cause it hurts

pain is livid to me

my life is written in it

no gimmick in me

god and the devil both living in me

sometimes i lose the mask

my skin turns to glass...

i kno 

i kno

u ...didn't...ask.

writteninpain